Multiple Personality

It’s fun to watch the opening group number on a results-show night, and try and figure out who choreographed it. Tonight’s Cirque du Soleil combination looked like pure Wade Robson, and I might have been able to savor the group pictures that were formed if the spastic camera had stayed in one place for more than two seconds. So I’m pretty sure it was good, but I didn’t take anti-barf medication before that particular sea cruise so I can’t be positive. And then it turned out to be done by Mia Michaels. I won’t try and psychoanalyze why a Mia dance looked like a Wade dance . . . maybe New-Bleach-Blonde-Mia is Wade-ier than her previous incarnation. It’s, like, too trippy to ponder. But I liked what I could see of the number. And, once again, Comfort was given a featured role in the proceedings. I think something’s up with that.

Cat then came out in an outfit that looked like someone ripped open Queen Victoria’s neck ruff and threw it all over the Deeley boobies. It wasn’t a bad look; just scalloped. And tall. That woman is being dressed by someone with an Attack of the 50-Foot Woman fixation; Cat is already tall, and them stiletto fuck-me pumps take her where the air thins. In short order we learned the three couples up for elimination: Chelsea and Thayne, Comfort and Not-Marquis, and Kourtni and Mark (though the suspense was whether it would be that last couple or Jessica and Will; let’s just say that Jessica is one very lucky girl, riding on the POPular-guy status of Will).

There was a group hip-hop number that just sucked donkey weenie. It featured some former contestants, but it was that stupid kind of hip hop that reminds me of those puppets behind glass at Chuck E. Cheeze that respond to music with a jerk here or there. The jerks here were all responding to some ambling dialogue track with occasional pops of music, and the whole thing meant absolutely nothing. And the spastic camera was back, so they may have all been standing there making monkey faces, for all the perspective we could glean. I wonder how many bloggers have to respectfully suggest that the director calm the fuck down, before the show takes a chill pill with the editing and lighting of these dance numbers.

The solo dances broke down this way . . . Among the girls, Chelsea danced technically well but seemed beaten down by the pressure; Comfort danced spiritedly and with some personality, but didn’t wow me; and Kourtni burned it up royal. With the boys, Thayne was very strong and focused; Not-Marquis was well-centered for his triple pirouette but otherwise rambling without focus; and Matt wasn’t brilliant but still impressive technically. I’m concerned about this elimination, because I’d like to see all three of these girls stay, but Jessica isn’t among them to be sacrificed. With the boys, I was sure it was going to be Not-Marquis last week, and I have no reason to believe that the judges have become suddenly smarter this week. I’d really like the other two to stay, but I’m dubious.

And now, a performance from some girl who won American Idol, whatever that is. None of the little girls in the pseudo-mosh pit were looking at her while she was singing . . . someone tell Simon Cowell not to buy that fourth mansion.

Chelsea was the eliminated girl, and I thought it might happen. It was partially justified, since she seemed to have lost some of her momentum. I think the luck of the draw screwed her, because getting the dreaded quickstep at that particular juncture was the opposite of what she needed. During her farewell montage, we were reminded of the ball of energy that did the cha cha, and that girl didn’t seem to quite be here any longer. I will miss her, though. And I have to wonder why it’s politically so important for the show to keep Comfort around.

I’m about to unfreeze the TiVo and see which boy is eliminated. With the apprehension the show seems to have about splitting up couples, I’m concerned that Thayyyynnne is in danger. If Not-Marquis isn’t the chosen exiter, there’s gonna be some splainin’ to do.

Okay, life on this planet can continue. Chris was elminated (I will use his real name this once, in deference and good-sportsmanship). Thayne will now be dancing with Comfort. I am quite interested to see this new pairing next week, and I’m hoping it helps keep Thayne out of the bottom three. But if you stop to think about it, it’s pretty hard to think of three boys or three girls that should be in the elimination corral, from the dancers remaining. Which means that we have reached the point where the dancers are more talented than the director; perhaps the abundance of talent will have a soothing effect on Spastic-Cam.

This entry was posted on Friday, June 27th, 2008 at 12:04 am and is filed under So You Think You Can Dance. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.